Saturday, April 29, 2006
Hey, I'm back . (:
Friday, April 21, 2006
Land of the Long White Camry here I come!!!!
whatever that meant.
hahaha.
I'm feeling a little feathery now (if there's such a feeling), it's as if this weight has been gently lifted by a pair of soothing forceps from my shoulders and everything's gonna rock when I leave for Cambodia in 8 hours. A momentary respite? A temporal release? Nehmine all that matters is that I'm leaving...on a silk air, don't know when I'll be back again...Actually I do, but that's immaterial.
Honestly I believe this trip's gonna be smashing. Firstly I don't think I could have chosen a better bunch of dudes/dudettes to go with. I mean with all the hooha about going with your friends and stuff, I'm really really thankful that I have people like hans, yang and arthur to hang out with. Even though I signed up first for the trip because I thought I could go together with someone, and besides the fact that it was Muse night, and I signed up only at 2am, I realized that I'm very very grateful for how everything it has turned out. I mean the programme's already freaking awesome, how much better it is with awesome-er people (: Yes, even though Beijing is still a bittersweet heart's pine away, sometimes we should just cherish what we have. Now everybody...1, 2,3...awwwww.
haha in other news I have watched the DVD of the Vault approximately 74878734 times, and counting. Brings back fresh the memories and damn that was an unforgettable experience. Today in the caf Ashvin was like "ah screw it", and then Elsa and I turned to each other at the very same moment and went " The Vault!" almost simultaneously, and spent the next few moments trying to remember where that came from . (: Ah good times. I shall go watch it again after this..heh.
Righto, so I guess I won't be updating this place for a week, which is quite unfortunate, because the past few days I have been inspired to write more and more in this place. And don't you lourrvee Patterns In The Ivy by Opeth? Erm the background song la the guy with the perplexed look on his face at the back.
Anyway, here's to a great week in Cambodia..7 hours more folks! In your face!
i'llbeback. and the helium content of this post astounds me. shudders.
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
Opeth are so damn good live, it's not even funny.
Out on the road there are fireflies circling.Deep in the woods, where the lost souls hide.Over the hill there are men returning. Trying to find some peace of mind.
Sleep my child
Under the fog there are shadows moving.Don't be afraid, hold my hand. Into the dark there are eyelids closing. Buried alive in the shifting sands
Sleep my child
Speak to me now and the world will crumble.Open a door and the moon will fall. All of your life, all your memories Go to your dreams, forget it all.
Sleep my child
Delivered at 9:35 PM;
Sunday, April 16, 2006
Woah I can't believe how much I have written today, and this might not be the time, and this might be a little erm excessive...
but oh how I've missed your voice.
in the purest and most un-strings attached way possible.
You Are a Retrospective Soul 
Great moments of insight and sensitivity come to you easily.But if you aren't careful, you'll ignore these moments and repeat past mistakes.For you, it is difficult to seperate the past from the present.You will suceed once you overcome the disappoinments in life.
Souls you are most compatible with: Traveler Soul and Prophet Soul http://www.blogthings.com/whatkindofsoulareyouquiz/
Delivered at 8:20 PM;
Vulnerable.
In case it appears to be otherwise, I am just very passionate about things I am very passionate about . I need to calm down sometimes though. (:
In other news, I've rediscovered the beauty of the French language, and while I sorta feel a bit for the death of the Chinese writing man, it's a whole new experience for me. Actually I didn't really discover it much, as I'm still in the process of organising my French notes, but I'm sure by the end of tonight, I'll have learnt something. For example, did you know the word threesome came from the French because they're the only people in the world to have beds in hotels which come in King, Queen, and triple-size?
Like I said, I wanna learn some French tonight. But seriously, the French language is beautiful..
vive le francais. Oh and I can't wait for my centrestage DVDs to come in from blt tmr. it's with bated breath that I wish to relieve the moments. And yet there are those that you don't really wanna relieve, but do becaus they have made such indelible marks on your heart, some fresh. Suddenly I feel a little small. And on any other day, I would be esctatic.
Jesus loves the little children..
Delivered at 7:27 PM;
Ok so I woke up this morning and with my daily cup of dark caffiene goodness sought to see what awe inspiring, thought provoking news and issues the Sunday Times brought and boy wasn't I in for a real treat. Navigating past the 6 election pages of the PAPer, with the Opposition party's coverage to the ruling party equivalent to the girl guy ration in IB at the start of the year, I came to the Sweat section and boy did it stink.
Apparently after the mandatory EPL results, fixtures and other important sporting news there's always this small column, nicely tucked closely just behind the Obituraries.When I saw today's column, the student in me was just begging to hear what " ACS(I) and SSC can learn from Siglap Sec"
Last week in the same space a scathing attack on my school, Anglo-Chinese School (Independent) was launched. for its apparent lack of ownership and responsibility regarding the "biting and stamping incident" that occured during the...ah you know the details... It didn't warrant a response because its arguments were somewhat bordering on the wtf,(which I will not quote lest I misquote,but it really was wtf inspiring)
Hence, Good Sir:
In two weeks you have questioned our School's morals, the Christian vaules we are founded on, the integrity of our Senior Admin, the competence of our School teachers, the capability of our School in handling disciplinary matters and I don't know what beef you have against Anglo-Chinese School (Independent), but let me tell you it has some serious MCD.
In your opening two paragraphs of today's tirade , you said ( and I quote werd4werd) :
"One is a school that has gone international, the other is from the neighbourhood.
But if there's one thing Anglo-Chinese School (Independent) can learn from Siglap Secondary, it's the art of public relations."
Well well a round of applause for Mr. Diplomat himself. Thank you, kind sir for having the courage to link a school sporting event with the school's expansion programme? So it's like what, 5 schools bearing your name = 5 times the violence? puhleeze. On the other hand, seeing the way you describe the school that you're trying to ride on, it ain't very nice to label it as "one from the neighbourhood" ain't it? Yes, we commonly use the term "neighbourhood school", but definitely not in the press, and we don't see things like "Sustained Award for A Neighbourhood School" don't we? And if I was a student from Siglap Secondary I doubt I would pride myself to be a member of the "neighbourhood school" that did what ACS couldn't do. What do you think this is? David vs Goliath?
And now, since there is an obvious need to use big, Sun Tzu-esque terms like " the art of public relations" let us see what this good sir means by ACS not having the art of said.
"When two ACSians were caught misbehaving at a school's rugby match against St Joseph's Institution, ACS(I) adopted a siege mentality. The principal would not talk to the media, though there was questions of public interest to be answered."
First of all, you make it seem like it was an act of gleeful mischief, that boys, being boys (or is it just ACS boys) would stamp and bite. You make it sound like the acts themselves were unprovoked, and of the same ilk as an act of vandalism or thievery. Come on, why make it appear that the school's shielding two criminals from the law?It's not a matter of making excuses, and there's no point in saying that the truth of the matter was that the biter did what he did after being headbutted illegally by the Josephian during the scrum. And as a matter of fact they have been punished accordingly by the SSC.
So my question is, after my fellow school mates have been massacred by the media and punished by the relavent authorities, why pursue the matter in asking for us to reveal their names, and question further Dr.Ong's ability to handle disciplinary matters in relation to Siglap Secondary's principal Mr. Ng Chee Keong? It's as if you personally WANT them to be shamed and crucified in the school sporting circles.
"... it is not only the rugby fraternity that wanted to know why the two offenders were still not named." No prizes for guessing who else wants my fellow ACSian's named and shamed. Sheesh. May I ask then, what good will naming them in public do? It's not like all we have done is wrapped the dudes in wool and say now now we won't let people know lwittle honey poo bit someone because no one wants to hurt lwittle honey poo..awwww. Please. I believe that our School is entitled to the right of disciplining our students as we like. The MOE has no requirement for us to disclose the names of our ruggers, neither has the SSC asked us to shame them publicly . So, good sir, what right do you have, to question our integrity and insinuating that we are a cowardly institution who dare not face the music? Just look at what you said!
" The point is, Siglap's principal Ng Chee Kheong took the trouble to explain the school's rationale to the media. He did not hide behind a rock and pretend that the incident never took place. Nor did he hope that it would just blow away with time."
Well , HAVE WE? Well it's not like you would let the matter rest even if we wanted it to just blow away with time. Do you think you are doing the sporting fraternity justice by constantly raking up what you deem our flaws week in week out in your column? Do you think that no disciplinary action was taken? Or that no counselling has taken place? If you think that all we, Anglo-Chinese School (Independent) has done is "shielding them when they are wrong", you good sir, are a little naive. Dr Ong is an incredible leader and no matter how many Big Brother jokes make their rounds, he still leads the school with immense vision, honesty, competence and most importantly a God fearing heart. So what makes you think he'd subscribe to the various forms of cowardice that you have pigeon holed us to posses?
You good sir, I doubt, have any relation to Anglo-Chinese School (Independent) apart from having maligned us without evidence in the national newspaper. I honestly don't know if this is because you have a personal need for school sportsmen who have erred to be crucified in front of everyone, or there's a personal agenda against my school which you have, and which I will not argue for because unlike you, I don't make claims without evidence.
So after rolling out the red carpet for Siglap Sec, let me ask you good sir, why do we have to "explain the school's rationale to the media"? Why is it that it's beyond you that we as a Christian school would believe in something called grace, and that after having our gentlemen punished for their actions, find that it is enough to say it's finished? Did the SJI kid and his family ask for their public shaming? No. Did the SCC or MOE ask for public condemnation? No. Did my school ignore this matter with regards to discipline? No.
"It is still not too late for ACS(I) to come forth and present its side of the story. Yes it has a sacred task of protecting its young chages. But this does not include shielding them when they are wrong."
We do not need to present our side of the story because you media will just hype it up further. Oh what a field day you people had when we lost the final to some school. Oh how you presented the loss to be because of the banned players and oh how much emphasis you had on the fact that when the ruggers cried, a school cried with them. Oh how you overlooked the fact that we were disallowed a try which would have won the game for us. You want us to stop having a siege mentality? Stop the discrimination. Seriously, I don't understand how one could think that just because no public shamng has taken place means no discipline has occured? It's an incredibly narrow minded and biased point of view, mind my words.
You have been ranting about my dear school for the past two weeks, the first victimizing SJI so much that my heart just bled with pity. And the second saying that we have poorer PR skills than another school simply because what they've done is this :
"First Nabil was given two strokes at a public caning. He was sent for counselling and suspended for one match against Victoria."
Your definition of apt PR skills astound me good sir. Like I've said, I don't know what beef you have with my school, neither do I know why you think that just because no one has been named publicily equals no action being taken, and no justice served. As you are surely well aware of, a two-year ban and a six match suspension was metted out. And if this is not justice, I don't know what is.
Personally it saddens me that someone as esteemed as you(looking at your post in the Straits Times hierachy) would border on defamation and insult to get a couple of names broadcast on your publication. I do hope that it's not your intention and somewhere deep inside, under your illusions of objectivity and fairness, realize that we are not shielding our students. Hell no. Rather we do not see the need to reveal our ways of discipline to of all people an editor, if not the MOE and SCC, in the hope that we get 'better press'. Anglo-Chinese School (Independent) is a school unlike no other, and it's with pride that I wear the school badge, and it's with pride that I bleed blue and yellow blood. Seeing my school's integrity questioned like this without evidence I am saddened that people are under the asumption that we do not posses the ability to correct our students. Thus I hope that if you ever wanna slam my school again, dear sir, please have the evidence that we have erred, and more importantly please don't assume the role of the saviour of sporting circles or trying to make a Singaporean sporting Watergate, because something tells me that you're measure of impartiality and honest commentary is somewhat different from mine.
Thank you.
The best is yet to be.
Delivered at 4:39 PM;
Saturday, April 15, 2006
I could tell from the minute I woke up
It was gonna be a lonely lonely lonely lonely day
Monday, April 10, 2006
Oskays, so today was the start of Religious Emphasis Week, or Relationship Emphasis Week like the dude said. Hmm. Well, what do you really want me to say? Besides the fact that I think it's not very smart if you wanna have an outreach programme to the school, and have the majority of non-Christians skip it and go slack off in some tamil/malay room. Kinda defeats the purpose doesn't it? And well, there may be some MOE regulations and all that red tape bout subjecting students of different religions to three days of evangilism, but still. And how many of those people that attend REW actually do so for reasons other than skipping the first periods of the day, and to get some 40 + winks? 'Aite I won't be judgemental and condemn everyone there to fire and brimstone. Generalizations tend to screw people up. Especially if you generalize on the net. Woohoo blogs. Shudders. But the truth is that I feel less and less of the RE in the REW. To me it's the acronym for Really Exhausted Weaklings, or some other bad pun...
But what's important, well to me at least is that slowly I feel myself being a little cynical of the way the whole Christian shebang thing is going on in the school. Wait before you condemn me to fire and brimstone, just understand that I haven't been secularized. I haven't lost any faith in Jesus. I believe I know Him personally, and knows that He knows me. I love Him. And I do trust in and talk to Him. But I can't help but feel a tad annoyed and restless during chapel sometimes, when there is simply nothing besides the tangible that could convince me that this was in fact a chapel! It's like this whole Methodist ministry thingy is done out of compulsion instead of passion. And the powers that decide our fates are compelled to churn out the same staid material that is not in essence bad or lousy( I love hymns too), but really...are you gonna reach ANYONE if you don't notice that half the upper gallery during chapel can't follow the high pitches and uncommon melodies of the old hymns(i'm speaking on behalf of a non-christian student), and that another 1/4 are asleep?
Honestly. And I will say this straight. There is nothing. Nothing in the school, that makes me wanna become a better Christian. Wait, let me rephrase. I love ACS(Independent) so much that it pisses me off when some SJI parents say immature, and downright ridiculous stuff like, "It's because they have Year 5 students in the team so that's why they're so rough."And your point is? How in hell does the fact that we have seniors in our B'Div Rugby equate to someone biting the opponent? So you mean Sec 4s turn carnivorous once their 17 year old seniors enter the team? I'm defintely not condoning the act, but I do know the guy, and all I can say is that no one really justifys the Saint in their school logos anymore, so stop taking things outta context. Clearly you catch no ball. That's why you got mauled so badly dammit. The dude did wrong, but condemning the entire team and questioning our school's integrity is way outta line. I'm not gonna use any vulgarities because it may just decrease the elegance and standard of this tirade, but seriously.
ahwell, back to topic I guess. I'm in a little of a pensive mood right now, slightly perplexed. With regards to my faith, It has never wavered. And yet like I said, no one in the school, has made me wanna become a better Christian. It's true. I dunno, I have never been in the 'christian' crowd, seeing that I don't come from a Methodist Church and all, and there's always an air of elitism I percieve. But it's fine, as long as they're doing what they're doing for God ( I hope), I have no qualms. And I don't know, it's kinda weird? That while on one hand I do know what the speaker said, that Christianity is a relationship, not a religion because hell yea, that's the whole purpose of it all! But on the other hand its like this relationship is between Him and me, or should it be different? Alastair wants to mobilize all the Christians and "touch the school". I see it with tinted glasses though.. How can we touch the others? Is there a need to? Do people even care? And what's up with all the theology and head knowledge if you can't get to the hearts of the people? The need for guitars, drums, three lead singers and a host of other ornamental objects if the hearts of the people aren't there. Think about it. Why are we doing whatever we do for. It's not friggin Nike. We don't "just do it" around here. Yeah and that means not force feeding people theology. Stop forcing people to go to prayer meetings. It's not a frag count contest. And I mean, personally I have readily admitted I'm not your big Christian brother role model I would have liked to be. I do know that, and I haven't made myself out to be a holier than thou guy, although I wish I could say I was a better representation of God's character. sigh. But, to those who choose to associate yourself with the bible thumpers, and ya know filll their mp3 players with nothing but Hillsongs and Planetshakers, and other stuff...make sure you're not found wanting in the moral department.
I am not making excuses. Just because I don't attend the morning cell groups dosen't mean I don't have to live my life according to God's word. And I 'm learning, by myself I guess. But all I'm saying is that...don't be hypocritical. Please.
So I'm not really certain who my angst is directed against now. The system? Pretense?Hypocrisy? But all I know, is that REW should be just that, the rewind on the VCR of life (haha). Maybe I'll be able to rewind some of the stuff that has hardened my heart abit. Not to Christ, but rather to people, and sometimes I feel that I dont' owe people a smile if I don't mean it. And I don't owe people a kind word if they don't deserve it. But who knows, press the remote and maybe after this LONG ASS post I can turn back some time, and be mr. nice all over again..
tick.
Sunday, April 09, 2006
Sorry for that rather decadent and un-self censoring previous post. But it's true, Creep without the erm, crucial word loses all its teeth. I hope my morals aren't eroding, but really, "so very special" just don't cut it .Geddit, cut, teeth? nehmine.
Anyway I believe I tend to over think a tad bit. And my associating and connotating skills scare me another tad bit. I was at whatsamacallit City Hall mrt station today and on the glass doors was this outlandish white, purple and lime green poster that had a couple, somewhat middle aged, in bed with those real amateurish speech bubbles ala the Superman comics of the 1970s. Her speech bubble said " Honey I wanna start a family" and his was " Sure, let's do it with James." And waaaaaaaaaaay below, there was a caption which said something along the lines of " Planning your future? Do it With James Loans and Financial Schemes."
aiya. thought Singapore just became liberal land. haha.
Thursday, April 06, 2006
wah liow....
ken ` i saw liow. beat orion says:
hey do you have creep by radiohead
yang liow 2 : orion 1 says:
ya
ken ` i saw liow. beat orion. says:
the one i got is a U2 cover
ken ` i saw liow. beat orion. says:
which means they dont say fuck.
yang liow 2 : orion 1 sends Radiohead - Creep.mp3
yang liow 2 : orion 1 says:
hahaha
yang liow 2 : orion 1 says:
.
thats
yang liow 2 : orion 1 says:
liek teh best part
ken ` i saw liow. beat orion. says:
not that i love it when people say fuck la...
ken ` i saw liow. beat orion. says:
but yea
yang liow 2 : orion 1 says:
hahhahaha
ken ` i saw liow. beat orion. says:
hahahah
lubchew yang!
Monday, April 03, 2006
I do believe I ran myself out today. It was like what, 7 seconds to an A. 10:27. Whoopeee. Hurrah.
"Hey where are ya going?"
"I'm not going home."
I am insignificant. In this grand scheme of things.
The urban poetry anthology of Singapore is pissing me off. Besides a few sincere, heart felt poems that you know, you can identify with, most of these 'works' are slippery little fellas masquerading as literature and under the delusion that using irregular rhyme scheme and placing random Capital letters All over The Place means great thought and introspection. Bullshit. So what if this is a book that we are encouraged to read in order to take a glimpse into what "national identity" is all about, all this book does is prove to me that Singaporean poets are a bunch of uppity hypocrites who are under the guise that writing like their beloved colonial masters in describing the city like Wordsworth would describe his daffodils scream quality and whatnot. Seriously, get the idea of poetry representing the Urban landscape of Singapore is not a half baked idea, but rather some of the works I see on display are essentially pretentious, and I don't know, overtly ambitious perhaps? Keep it real Shakespeares, don't try to be something that you ain't. Especially when you're talking about your country.
The best entry by far, is the one which shows irreverence for the pigeon holing that the rest of the poets have underwent. Why is it that Singaporean poets are so adamant at becoming another Frost, trying to describe our concrete jungle in terms of nature and the like. Attempting to use nature to describe the human condition is a grandiose idea to say the least, but the fact that you're Singaporean dosen't help, especially when your so called perception of nature, is unabashdly limited.
And once again, it ain't cool to write verse and verse and verse,
and end off the poem
like this. Because
you think the colonial masters you
so want to follow
might
appreciate this shit.
Leadership Is What I Get From You (Bastards, Don't You Ever Kiss Ass)
Our camp commander - this was only so because he had shown great integrity, leadership skills and all roundedness to the instructors - was yelling at us : it was the first day of camp, his face was a big o and his mouth was a big o, o people, he shouted, you guys have not woken up yet, so all o you - do twenty pushups now, he made it seem so easy, and I wanted to yell at him : i can do that too, stand there and tell others to do fucking pushups , and the rest of us without these leadership qualities went down o onesir, o twosir, o threesir, like countless waves breaking upon the sandy shore.
-Johann Loh
Delivered at 10:27 PM;
Sunday, April 02, 2006
mel + photoshop = nuff said
Saturday, April 01, 2006
Wow. Just wow. There's so many things I want to say, so many things I want to do, so many things I want to think about, and even more that I can't afford to. Can't remember the last time I actually wrote a proper entry, must be about half a month ago I believe. And sometimes I feel compelled to write. But I procrastinate. Procrastinating from updating a personal journal? God kenneth you should do better. But now, as I finally get down to the actual e-penning down of my thoughts, there's this weird vibe, kinda like a jolt of electricity that compels me to type and type and type. It's as if everything that tugs at my heart is translating itself now on the screen I am staring out. Surreal experience this is, kinda like writing a play, where you know the characters, you know the plot, but the lines and dialogue just jump out at you, as if from the characters' mouths themselves.
So my heart and to a lesser extent my brain tell me how they feel, and I can recognize these emotions to be my own, and yes they are all true.But some of them are unfamilar because of the lack of visitiation, but they are all mine. As my hands glide over the keyboard in harmonious ignorance I see, as if watching on stage the stuff that has touched me, hurt me, made me smile and frown all flow across the screen. And as I see these images in words a burden is intangibly and inaudibly lifted from within me. It's kinda weird, that as I'm writing this entry, some sort of theraphy is going on inside. Shit I can't believe how introspective this post is, but I can't really stop this automatic purging of the soul... Tis good, this blogging.
But first, speaking of writing plays, and you all know where this is going... yesh, The Vault, where come to think of it, therein lies the rollercoaster of my life. Remember how we would say during Lit classes that "The poet didn't mean this la" or, questioning whether were we "overanalyzing", well I sorta feel this way now. The Vault holds a dear place in my heart because each and every one of the characters has something inside that was taken out from my own being and placed into them. I guess that's the joy of writing and directing a play, and the exhaustion of it as well, since you put your entire being into your work, and see your own ideas being expressed and translated on stage by others. Now that it's all over, I feel a dullness in me because..well it's over, and parts of me are gone now, together with the play.
By no admission did I write the play by myself. The final Vault script that you saw presented on stage last night was a mixture of input from my co-writers Mel and Ben Soh( working from 8am to 2 one day at Starbucks ^^), as well as improvisation and amendments during rehearsals by both writers and actors themselves. I've always said that humour has to be spontaneous. I don't like it when people say "Hey write a play. And MAKE IT FUNNY." That's selfish thinking, trying to purposefully illicit laughter to make your work look good. The funniest things in life are always the events that happen in our day to day life and the colourful reactions to otherwise staid circumstances. A playwright dosen't make his play funny. It's only funny because the audience is able to interpret it to be so. And that's why humour, for me is a very much hallowed institution of the human psyche. Comedy is not stupidity. Stupidity can be funny, but stupidity is not comedy. Someone should tell the channel 5 sitcom writers that, but that's another story altogether..
The Vault is very special to me. Simply because I poured my heart and soul into it. And im not talking about quantity, although the many hours spent with cast and crew are ones that I'll always treasure. I don't really know how to explain it, but I've never felt so strongly about something I have written before. Sigh. I can't seem to put a hold onto it, or put into words how much the Vault really means to me.hmmm
Something happened inside me, last night when at the end of the play you threw flowers onto the stage, and you stood up clapping and cheering. Something clicked inside me, something that said hey guess what, these people feel how you feel as well. And something told me, that I'm not alone after all....And that was when I knew, that it dosen't matter that this script is not "Kenneth's script", or that I have no right to say "this is my story." All that matters, is that I felt. And the audience felt too.
I have to run now, dinner awaits, so I'll write more later I guess..but for now I guess I'll be content with reliving each moment in my heart till we meet again... vive le vault (:
"Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?"
(who will guard the guards?)
Frankson Takumi Tan Ah Kow is a man just like you and I. Working in a bank as a security guard, he strives for the things that we all strive for in life- wealth, companionship, and most of all happiness. Guarding the Vault in the bank each day, he is a simple man, with simple hopes, dreams and longings. But what will Frankson do, when a figure from the past emerges and threatens to snatch away his future? Will a mere security guard be able to take a stand and make his own dreams a reality? And how does all this relate to three down and out vagrants whom society has given up upon as well? It is in the Vault, where love blossoms and withers, relationships are formed and broken, hopes are dashed and dreams come true. It is in the Vault where we are challenged to make the right decisions, to determine what we really are living for, and to accept the consequences inherited which may change our lives permanently. And at the end of it all, when all has faded away, let us ask ourselves, who will be there to guard the doors to our deepest desires, and who will be there keep a watch over the heart and its devices, if not us?
Delivered at 11:40 AM;