Carpe Diem

THOUGHTS

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

the reflection I wrote for the Cambodia Booklet that we compiled, entitled "les commencer"

Ironic it may be to title a set of closing thoughts 'The Beginning', you do realize its aptness after a while in the sense that this, besides being a precursor to the other articles and reflections in this booklet, is inherently not a summary of what we have done on the trip to Cambodia, and neither is its purpose to recap mere activities and routine. Rather, it will probably give you an indication of the issues, thoughts and emotions mentioned in the following works, and it is my hope, that after digesting the very last word of this booklet, you would think for yourself, 'This is only the beginning'. Just imagine if you would: How meaningless would it be, to open a Window On a World for just an instant, taking a glimpse of what lies beyond the spectrum of our comfort zones, and in the end slamming it down quickly upon our return to the tumult of everyday life at 121 Dover Road, once again diminishing and dimming our world view and perception of the world, which I can assume have been verily changed.

On the way to get a much craved for teh peng after returning home from Cambodia on the 28th, the penchant for cliched questions my dad had got the better of him, and he asked me: 'What is one word that you would use to describe your trip?' After repeating the query a few more times due to my apparent lack of interest with anything other than the imminent cup of milky goodness, I finally answered, in the hope that I would not give a cliched response, that one word I would use to describe this trip, was 'different.' Stunned that I would give an answer apart from 'amazing', 'fun' or 'fantastic', we rode the rest of the way in silence. However the word 'different' never left my mind.

Firstly the destination, Cambodia, was not one which we signed up for in the hope that we would get a well earned vacation from the doldrums of school life. I had no idea of what to expect in Cambodia beforehand, but something told me it would not include sprawling big malls and other things associated with a dream get away. Cambodia was different, unlike any other overseas trips, or OEPs that I have been to. I think it says a lot when one of her main tourist attractions is a former prison accustomed to having blood splattered on its walls and floors, and its halls and corridors echoing the screams and wails of tortured victims. Victims, who had their nationality stated Cambodian. Cambodia was different. A land consumed by its past, stuck in a vile time machine of sorts, where its people want to move on, unshackle themselves from the ugly brand of a Third World Country, as well as their dark history, but cannot because they are constantly forced to revisit this history in the name of tourism to attract the very foreign dollar that they so need to rebuild their country. Cambodia was different. What she could not come up with in terms of entertainment value, she made up for in rustic, old world charm that left me wondering how amazing a place she would be if not for the misdemeanours of her own people.

Secondly, the people were different. In the most literal and metaphorical sense you can imagine. Their outlook on life made me question my own, and as you will read in the rest of the works, contained grit, determination and defiance layered under the most beautiful and contented smiles you could ever find. Defiant towards circumstance, defiant towards economic status, defiant towards history, the Cambodians which we came into contact with belied the reality of their lives, and made me question the distinction between what I need and what I want in my own life, and I admit, is indeed quite blurry. The kids at COSI had something different from us. They had an unabashed view of God, a view not affected by the kind of songs we sing, the instruments we play, the number of people we have in our church or anything else. Rather, they had an unadulterated view of Christ, one which contained gratefulness, thankful for their very existence. An example of this is would be during the worship sessions that we were fortunate to be a part of. And without elaborating too much, something that I took away was the realization that a relationship with God can be so simple. Worship needing to be nothing more than a voice and the occasional worn out snakeskin drum. No need for elaborate set ups, vast choirs and the most expensive instruments, because beneath all that,

God looks at the heart.
And the kids at COSI had heart.

Thirdly and finally, we ourselves are different. I do not think that it is mere coincidence that the twenty six of us have been placed together on this journey. Without taking into account complications regarding the whole WOW signup and other perfunctory matters, I can say that we are a special lot. More special than other OEP groups, and we definitely did not come together by accident. And yes, writing the first article in this booklet grants me permission to make such grandiose claims. But to be honest, I could envisage going on this trip with nobody else. Over that one week in Cambodia, my outlook on rife, rove, famary, health, buddies and other entities have been challenged and refreshed, and I can proudly say that I have come out of this experience a new person. And I hope the rest of us have been changed too by this once in a lifetime experience to a place not usually associated with fun, joy and hope, but containing these in abundance nonetheless.

Thus to conclude, it is the beginning. A beginning of newly forged friendships, of newly found awareness, of greater sensitivity to the world around us, to new love found in our hearts, and to a changed out look in life. I hope that after reading the following pages, we will not forget our experience in Cambodia ever, the kids we have met, in whose lives we should continue to make a difference, as well as each other and the times spent together, because we are a really, really, really, special bunch. So even as the people of Cambodia attempt to rebuild their lives, and as we over here in Singapore attempt to keep up with the pace of our own existences there’s only one thing to say in finality, as ACSians have done since time millennia: The Best Is Yet to Be. For us, and for the people of Cambodia, who have taught us to live life, the way it should be done.

Delivered at 9:04 PM;